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Jan. 24th, 2006 03:29 pmSo... last night as I was trying to go to sleep (already ridiculously late because I had pre-job-interview jitters) I began having an idea for ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
wizard_love. And the idea just grew. So I lay there thinking about it and trying different ideas and scenarios (and even characters, before going back to the original idea).
I finally fell asleep, but when I got back home this afternoon, still riding high in the aftermath of a good job interview and picking up my last paycheck, I sat down and thought I'd get a few words down on the computer. Just a few. So I had a starting place this weekend.
Well, 900 words later I have my very first attempt at het smut in a very long time and something that might actually be passable as a fic. Not a pairing I've ever written before, but characters of whom I am fond.
Is that last sentence grammatically correct? Grrr, I really need to take a class or something...
Anyways, I've actually got something written that isn't total suckage (although it still needs a lot of work) and will hopefully not disappoint the person who will receive it. These exchanges are rather nerve-wracking, because I never know exactly what kind of reception my stories will receive, and since I think any smut I write is simply a huge joke (Hah! Who does she think she is? This is crap!), I tend to be anxious about it. The person who receives my fic deserves something good- something that will, at the very least, be a pleasant way to spend a few minutes reading. They don't deserve a weird, choppy, laughable attempt at writing.
And that's how I feel sometimes.
I realize I won't become comfortable writing in "new" areas (such as smutty things, or thoughtful and plotty, or lyrical-type writing), unless I actually practice and write and get feedback and suggestions. But it's such an awkward process. I don't generally feel that sense of awkwardness reading other people's work, and I can't decide if my feelings about my own work are that way because it's my own or because it's bad.
Grrrr, so, I'm not so much on the floaty-happy wave anymore. Obvious much?
wizard_love. And the idea just grew. So I lay there thinking about it and trying different ideas and scenarios (and even characters, before going back to the original idea).I finally fell asleep, but when I got back home this afternoon, still riding high in the aftermath of a good job interview and picking up my last paycheck, I sat down and thought I'd get a few words down on the computer. Just a few. So I had a starting place this weekend.
Well, 900 words later I have my very first attempt at het smut in a very long time and something that might actually be passable as a fic. Not a pairing I've ever written before, but characters of whom I am fond.
Is that last sentence grammatically correct? Grrr, I really need to take a class or something...
Anyways, I've actually got something written that isn't total suckage (although it still needs a lot of work) and will hopefully not disappoint the person who will receive it. These exchanges are rather nerve-wracking, because I never know exactly what kind of reception my stories will receive, and since I think any smut I write is simply a huge joke (Hah! Who does she think she is? This is crap!), I tend to be anxious about it. The person who receives my fic deserves something good- something that will, at the very least, be a pleasant way to spend a few minutes reading. They don't deserve a weird, choppy, laughable attempt at writing.
And that's how I feel sometimes.
I realize I won't become comfortable writing in "new" areas (such as smutty things, or thoughtful and plotty, or lyrical-type writing), unless I actually practice and write and get feedback and suggestions. But it's such an awkward process. I don't generally feel that sense of awkwardness reading other people's work, and I can't decide if my feelings about my own work are that way because it's my own or because it's bad.
Grrrr, so, I'm not so much on the floaty-happy wave anymore. Obvious much?
